sucks-kayne

 I have great admiration for people with a high level of self-confidence. Kudos to you for knowing you’re awesome or even for being really convinced you are despite the fact no one agrees with you. You DO NOT suck.

You know who SUCKS?! Kanye West. I’m not going to lie, I rocked out to Stronger and know most of the words to Gold Digger, but this guy gets two SUCKING thumbs up for how unbelievably conceded he is. Here is a recent quote from Mr. West:

“God chose me. He made a path for me. I am God’s vessel. But my greatest pain in life is that I will never be able to see myself perform live.

Seriously?!?! Don’t be too upset Kanye. Did you hear your recent performance on SNL? You aren’t missing anything. In fact you SUCK almost as much live as you are conceited. 

Here it is if you want to hear what God’s chosen one sounds like live.

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sucks-traffic1

Look I’m not an unreasonable or unrealistic person.  I know traffic happens.  Traffic happens when there’s an accident, during rush hour, and when there’s construction. And as much as this sucks, I’ve learned to accept it for what it is.  What really SUCKS is traffic for none of the aforementioned acceptable reasons.  If I’m going to sit on the parkway for an hour to go ten miles (which happens more than I care to think about) and its not rush hour, I expect there to be A) an accident or B) some kind of emergency construction. What is completely unacceptable is sitting there for an hour only to find out there is an accident, but it’s on the other side of the road. Why does that cause you to stop and look and screw up my Friday? Oh yea, because you suck. And the absolute worst is when there is not even an accident of any kind, but a man on the side of the road changing his tire.  I feel bad that his day sucks, but by stopping to examine exactly what technique he’s using to change that tire you make my day SUCK too. And therefore, you SUCK for being a nosey a-hole.

sucks-8-dollar-ice

This one needs very little explanation. If you’ve paid $8 for an ice cube I’m pretty sure you know you SUCK.  I mean seriously there is absolutely no way to justify doing this no matter how much money you have.  The company making these says that using these $8 dollar ice cubes “allows differentiation from those consuming a premium drink from those with less discerning taste”.

Let me clear something up here. If you are the asshole drinking 8 dollar ice YOU SUCK.  But, if you’re the guy with the Miller Lite next to him and are jealous of his 8 dollar ice cube YOU SUCK MORE. Seriously people!

Thanks to Jenny F for the tip. Have you seen a product that totally sucks?  Email it to us at thisproductsucks at gmail dot com and I’ll give it a mention on here (if I agree that it sucks that is). Be sure to include your name or nickname as you want it displayed.

sucks-newsflash
We’ve all seen the news flashes that come on during our favorite shows. Find out how to cure cancer… at 11. The one food you need to eat to live forever… at 11. Look, I realize you can’t discuss the entire story right now, nor we I want you to, I mean c’mon we’re in the middle of House! What you are guilty of doing that SUCKS is making ridiculous claims that you obviously can’t support and then quasi successfully getting us to watch people like Ernie Anastos for the answers. The news sucks for claiming to know how to do things like live forever and they suck more for making us wait til 10 or 11 or whatever to find out they are big fat LIARS and indeed do not know! And what really SUCKS is that if they did have the cure for cancer, you better believe they’d wait til 11 to tell us.